city maze

the city in winter. how can i change my spectrum? i'm awaiting springtime with the crocus who tremble with the new frost each morning. they bend down and hug the earth and wait for the strong spring sunshine to warm their backs and help them stand.

the months are sneaking by; we are getting there. but on the dark days the streets take on tall, frightening bushlike qualities. the sun not so visible. winding black rivers into drainpipes, the runoff of snow and cold rain, collecting flickering leaves that beckon in their last airborne seconds like hands waving.

we all run around so discontent. i love seeing people who radiate satisfaction and gratefulness. most of my life i have been that person.


but it's hard to break out of a slump. whatever you call it- limbo, unsteady, rocky, lacking, frustrating, lackluster, nightmarish, unsettled- it holds you like a jealous lover. it's frighteningly hard to break free. it strangles the words from my throat and it sounds so lame to say that; so cliche, but i'm wrestling with invisible chains of my own creation, fumbling for hedgeclippers. 

putting it out there for the world to see is liberating.